Car killer

It was announced yesterday that the Hummer auto brand would be killed. What a totally avoidable disaster from the beginning. It was similar to many other retarded strategies from the most dysfunctional of companies, Government Motors.

Think about how this happened. The Hummer was badass, ultra-rugged military vehicle. It could drive through forty inch deep rivers, in rocky deserts, through underbrush, etc. It was much admired and frankly made men weak in the knees to think of having such a huge, uber manly beast. It wouldn't be convenient for getting groceries, but who cares?

Then Arnold Schwartzenegger got one. Even better. Only the Terminator can get one. So, GM got the rights to make it for the general public. So, we have this exclusive, huge, boxy monster that men want to pretend they will drive up mountains with. What is GM's strategy? First, they make it smaller and classier and more refined. Then they make tons of them to kill any idea that it is an exclusive brand. Then they make an even more docile, mannerly version derisively called "the girl Hummer." They make sure to emphasize not the name Hummer, or even better, Humvee, which even sounds like a military nickname (because it is). They call them H2 and H3.

They keep making them less boxy and more genteel, so that these well-mannered lapdog-type vehicles wouldn't intimidate a schoolgirl in pigtails. Also, they came in all kinds of pretty colors. It was a Barbie beach party kind of vehicle. In other words, they killed the soul of the vehicle, then drove a stake through the heart of it. I believe I read that they never made a profit on them, and sales started declining sharply after just a couple of years.

They had a lot of experience killing cars. They have done it over and over again. They popularized a car as an expensive sportscar. It was popular, so they made it into a cheaper family car. Then it wasn't popular, so they made it into a station wagon with a huge engine. Then they discontinued it. Then brought it back as a sportscar again before ruining it again.

In my mind, GM got completely and hopelessly lost in the 1960's and has never recovered. They were by far the biggest company in the world, richer than almost any country. They have whittled that down continuously for decades. Only the fact that they were so gigantic to start with has kept them alive after such a long continuous decline. Pathetic.